Saturday, September 30, 2006
Oh What A Day!
The man & the lady were freakin' out, we could hear them calling for us but we weren't about to come back, we were FREE! We managed to allude them for about 15 minutes, they would go one way & we would go the other. But then all the nosy neighbors joined in & were yellin' out of their windows tellin' our humans which way we were going, (note to selves, crap in ALL their yards & eat their flowers next outing). We could've prolonged the game but then we made the mistake of running down a driveway that had a fence at the end & the man there grabbed us & put us in his yard until our lady got there, drat him! Oh well, we gave it a good run!
We thought we had made them chase us long enough to miss the vet appointment, but nooooo, they snagged us up & threw us in her Jeep (fish stank & all) & off to the vet we went. The bonus is that her Jeep now stinks to high heavens like rotten fish & let's just say the back seat is trashed with wet dog hair & sand, woowoo! The vet guy didn't seem to impressed with our wet ordersome selves either. Ha, take that you clipper wielding freak!
It only got worse form there, they brought us back, threw us in the kitchen (it was beautiful out today to did we mention) & left for like 3 hours. By time they got home, the whole house smelt like nasty fish, which we thought was great until the next tragedy occurred, the dreaded bath. Boo hiss, we hate baths! AND she took our beds & washed them again too, so now we're wet & NO BEDS to lay on! That's why we have to lay on our stupid old blankets. You would've thought the madness would have stopped there, nope, then she felt compelled to brush us, we hate that too, she kept saying that's what we get. Just wait till she sees what she's gonna get, not sure what her punishment will be but it will be worthy of the crime we guarantee. It will have to wait for a while though, cause we must admit, we're very tired after our little walk about. See, we're learning, we didn't stick around this time & we didn't go in the road. We're trying to do ya all proud! K, back to nappytown now.
The Elusive Macie & Malechai
Thursday, September 28, 2006
I tried to tell him...
I'm warning you, get away from me!
I mean it, I'm going to be forced to bite
your face off!
Get off me you big Moose! Crap, here comes the lady.
Come on, lets go down in the yard where she can't see us.
This ain't over yet!
Once the cameras are off, it's ON! Let's just say, he was beggin' for mercy before I was done. The he goes & cries to the lady, the big wuss. Yet he always wants to start it. Will he never learn?!
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Ooooooh, I Wish This Was A Cat's Head!
Blah, blah, blah, stupid cats! I CAN NOT believe that the lady let that damned Akeer on my blog(Yeah, yeah, Malechai, I know it's our blog), doesn't she know that's like me using her toothbrush?! Unreal, turn your back for a couple minutes to go out & do your business & this happens. Well, fellow canines, I can not apologize enough for you all being subjected to that cat gibberish. I'm still in shock myself, you know, something bad is going to have to happen for this one. The man's been working on their hot tub(whata stupid contraption) I may have to go out there & "fix" the plumbing! That's a whole nother thing I don't get, a hot tub, why, why, why would anyone want to sit in 100 & something degree water, fill it with snow you idiots! In the mean time, see this bone, I hereby swear to make sure & leave it where she will step on it everytime she goes by! I hear it's painful when stepped on & it makes her dance around like her feet are on fire, always good for a woo or two.
Malechai wanted me to mention about that eye thing. He says he was young then & if she tries that again, he'll give her the slapdown & put her in the Steiner Recliner!
That's what he says, but you should see him run like a sissy when Callie faces him down. She knows better than to try that with me, I am the Queen! Hey it's my post, I can tell it like I want to.
OK then, I think it's time to get my plans in action for the ladies punishment, until next time, trip your humans! Miss MacieGrey
Sunday, September 24, 2006
These were the days, just lazin' around the house doing the cat thing. Those days are gone! Why they ever decided to get these minions of hell is beside us! We were a CAT HOUSE, the lady was known to others as "The CAT lady", not the dog lady! What happened, where did we go wrong? We knew something big was going to happen when they started screwin' our yard up. They put a huge litter box out there & then fenced it in, what in the world....Then it happened, they left for most of a day & then came back with DOGS!!!!! Little, whinny, peein' in the house, destruction machines. The whole house changed in a matter of a few hours, gates went up in every doorway, our water bowls were moved, a dark gloom had set over the house, the end of days is near! It hasn't changed since, only now the beasts have doubled in size & it's been said that they're not done yet, what have they brought into our home, horses (more like goats)?!
Anyway, I suppose some introductions are due, I'm Akeer (top left) and I am the oldest, wisest & ONLY male of this pride & these are my Harem. CallieMarie(top right) she's my girl, they got her just for me. She's also quite RUDE to everyone, including me, she doesn't take any crap off these dogs, laid the bottom of Malechai's eye open week 1. Then there's WhiteyFord (yes, the black cat), she's pretty mellow, mostly likes to hang out by herself in the garage, we see her at feeding time (she NEVER misses a meal!) and she stays completely away from the hethans. Next we have StoneyBob, (she's the grey one at the bottom), her & Whitey are sisters. She likes to lay on anyone's lap she can, she's a total suckup, her best quality is that she sits on the other side of the dog gates & antagonizes the hell out of them. And lastly, TalulaBelle (she's the little white & grey one on the left), my Mom rescued her from a dumpster behind her work, it took her almost a month before she could actually get her, she kept moving the food closer & closer & then, snatch, she got her & brought her home. She's the smallest of our pride, she will always be little, but she's also the most grateful to have a home. Don't be fooled though, dynamite comes in small packages & she can definitely hold her own.
So that's all of us, you won't hear much else form us as we don't care to "hang out" with dogs, we just wanted our complaints to be noted for the record. We do plan to teach the dogs to climb the fence so that they can run off & we can have our house back again! When you suddenly stop hearing from them, you'll know what happened....The Cats
Somebody Make Her Stop!
Notice our beds are gone, no we haven't chewed them up yet, but "Miss I have To Wash Their Beds All The Time", took them already. They weren't even officially stinkaticed! There she goes, messin' with our stuff yet again, will she never learn?!
We did get to have a nice long game of tug with her today though, that's always a good time. I personally like to act as if I'm losing my grip so I can bite her hand when I reposition myself, it's really the only thing that makes this game worth while. Of course, Malechai had to come over & stick his big fat head in the middle of it so y'all know what happened then, yep, "Fight Club" was on! The lady doesn't even move anymore when we do this, she used to freak out when ever we'de really get going at it, now she just sits there (in our way, might I add) and watches. This ain't a free show lady, where's your ticket (all chicken treats are acceptable forms of payment)!
I wish she would just let us go out in the rain, we have a big tree that keeps the ground pretty dry & this is truly the best time to dig up nightcrawlers! Mmmmm, wiggly, dirt covered earthworms, oh how I love 'em! They are the greatest, not only are they tasty but they're fun, I like to toss them in the air & catch them. And all that wigglin' is like a party in your mouth! I think I will go perform the "peepee dance" at the gate so she will let us out, then good luck getting me back in, it's worm time!
Till next time, if you have a brother, go bite him, I'll about garantee he did something to deserve it! Macie
Friday, September 22, 2006
This has been so weird, maybe the lady's not as dumb as we thought!
Althea put a special "warning" out for us in regards to the before mentioned Birckenstocks, we relies this would be a bad move on our part, however, the lady has been warned, and if we are driven to such drastic measures, know that she will fully deserve it and we will have had no other recourse! She's got to learn sometime, we've had her for 4 1/2 months now. She guards those pretty close along with any other leather goods that we may find yummy so it wouldn't be any easy task by anymeans. Hey, so long as she stops messin' up our stuff, it'll all be good.
Guess what, the man went for a walk with us again, really, it's true. We heard the lady tellin' him the other day that she didn't get 2 dogs, they got 2 dogs, not sure what than means exactly, but she kinda growled it at him, next thing you know, he's up & going with us. She told us that if he didn't stay out of bed more after work, that she was gonna have to start going in there & checkin' him for a pulse & moving his legs back & forth so he doesn't get bed soars, again, she didn't say it her nice voice... It's funny, he gets in trouble almost as much as us. Only she's a lot nicer to us about it, we know she's all bark. She should just let us go in there & jump on him, that'll get him up with a quickness!
Well, we're going to go try & get on the Dogs With Blogs boards now, (the lady had problems with that too, see it may still be all her), you'll all know if she screws something else up as we will post pictures of the doggy demolition that will occur afterwards. Again, thank you all for being so helpful with our very own stupid human!
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
OK, Maybe she's had enough...
Oh, and we are very proud to announce that we had our first "score" on the counter surfing that we've been trying to master, an entire pack of saltine crackers, now them are some yummy little morsels, a little dry if you get too many in your mouth at once, but overall tasty! Plus you get the bonus plastic wrapper, that's never a bad thing. From there the weekend only improved we must say. First the man had our friend next door over & was showing him how well we "sit", (for Cheetos we will do anything), this was our first experience with these & they are the dogdiggity! Of course the lady about had a coronary when she saw him so we only got a couple.
She did follow up with some watermelon though & it is truly a toss up, (thank you Army of Four for putting the bug in her ear!) cheesy, crunchy stuff or the sweet, juicy stuff, it's probably safe to say that we won't get much of a choice unless we can con the man for the Cheetos when she's not home. We have had the melon a couple times now so we're not feeling too cheated.
While we were gone we got tagged by Althea so here are 5 things that make us good dog friends:
1. We have a big pool & sandbow that ALL dogs are welcome at.
2. There's lots of fruit in our yard that we would share.
3. We're not overly eager about the whole butt sniffin thing.
4. We have LOTS of energy so we can play along time.
5. We like all non-aggressive dogs!
Not very exciting, we know, but you guys are really all of the friends we have until we start our dog classes & can meet some other dogs. OK, there is Zeus a couple yards down, he's the same age as us but quit a bit smaller even though he's a lab. The only thing with him is, everytime we go down there, he's always got his "you-know-what" pokin' out at us & well it's rather, shall we say, GROSS! Hence the fact the lady doesn't like to take us down there very much, can't really blame her, it is kinda rude. She says she has friends with dogs but they never come over, we don't know why. We have heard her talk about a dog park that's about, oh a medium lenghth nap away. She said we can't go there until we learn some manners, something about not being socially acceptable, whatever that means! Just because we get a little excited when we meet people & jump, she says we're gonna knock someone's teeth out, we say get down here where we can give you a proper hello then. Dang, don't sniff butts, don't lick faces, don't jump on people, why doesn't she just go ahead & tell us to be cats & get it over with! So, we're going to go along with the classes if it means the dog park, we're just sure there's got to be others like us there! Well, we have to go for now, we can feel a round of "fight club" coming over us, ya'll go get yourselves some of those Cheetos, you won't be sorry!
Friday, September 15, 2006
What has she done now?!
Until next time, a very aggravated Macie & Malechai
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Are you freakin' kidding me!
Again, I'll ask, are you kiddin' me, the lady freaked out the other day & threw all the Nylabone
stuff out, somethin" about choking hazard & not digestible", whatever, anyway, see the blue & green shreds? That would be a ball that the silly man gave us while the lady was at work, some kinda of tasty foam rubber stuff. Of course the lady gets home, freaks out AGAIN, hollars at the man, throws all the yummy pieces away....We had to listen to her rant a good part of our walk about that ball! By all means take our hard rubber things away & give us some foam rubber,geesh! She did get us some new beds though, her & the man are taking bets on how long before we shred these, they do resemble our old lamby we had that we gutted (she threw that out too), I'm kinda enjoying snoozin' on it right now though, so I may wait awhile before destroying it, we'll have to see. The good news is the sun finally came out today so we got to be outside, big woo there! When the man came home from work we had been dilligently working on our tunnel (we're still looking for that Alaskan Pipeline thing) & he said this was the dirtiest he's seen us yet, it was a very proud moment in our huskism! We got in our pool before the lady got home so she didn't get to see us, we were lookin' good, you all woulda been proud! Better go, time to demand an orange!
Beware of the Backpacks, Malechai
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
How to Photograph a Puppy
1. Remove film from box and load camera.
2. Remove film box from puppy’s mouth and throw in trash.
3. Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle.
4. Choose a suitable background for photo.
5. Mount camera on tripod, check flash and focus.
6. Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth.
7. Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera.
8.Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees.
9. Focus with one hand while fending off puppy with other hand.
10. Get tissue and clean nose print from lens.
11. Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose.
12. Put magazines back on coffee table.
13. Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head.
14. Replace your glasses and check camera for damage.
15. Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say- "No, no outside!"
16. Call spouse to help clean up the mess.
17. Fix a stiff drink.
18. Sit back in chair, put your feet up, sip your drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and "stay" the first thing in the morning
Author Unknown (funny stuff & oh, so true!)
Paranoid New Mother?
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
What Did I Tell You?!
Pretty sure I said, "If it continues to rain I will be forced to eat another wall"....Ok, so it's only a roll of paper towels (I was a little leary of the wall after Meeshka's warning about the electricity stuff). Hey, what's a girl to do, this is going on day 3 of being stuck in the house due to the stupid rain! I had to be quick on my paws for this one, the lady was only out of the room for a couple minutes. She needed to know just how disgusted I am over the situation! She musta got the message, she didn't even hollar, just laughed & got the camera. I was a little miffed that she felt she needed to "clean up" my beautiful shredded creation though. I'll let it slide this time, only because she then gave Malechai & I each a big giant bone to work on, good humom! There's hope for her yet. Rain, rain, go away, we want to go outside & play!
Monday, September 11, 2006
Rainy Days & Mondays, Allways Get Me Down
Needless to say, we've had to be inside ALL day! I chose to sleep most of it away. Malechai tried to bug on me a couple times, but figured out I was in no mood after a couple of full frontal face bites! Leave me alone, I'm sulking. The few times that I've been conscious today, I've had a couple thoughts. One, I'm tired of all the "healthy crap" that we have to eat, we want to go to this Fazolis place that we heard Koda talking about. Will you look what she gave us as a "snack" yesterday, yes that's celery! What the heck?! Do we looked excited to you, paleeze, celery....This is what she feeds us friends, celery. Ok, so we are eating it, she had made it pretty clear that that was the snack o' the evening.
Then there's the Kong, we HATE THE KONG! It's the debil Bobby Bouche' (hopefully everyone has seen The Waterboy). Maybe it's just that our lady is stoooopid, we're not sure, but she shoves it full of those biscuit things & we can not get them out! We think it's a doggy torture device that the humans created! My brother is almost tall enough for that counter surfing that I hear you all talk about, his nose is right at the edge. He thinks I should let him climb on my back so he can reach, look at him, he's a moose, not happenin'! (He's the closest one to you, if you all couldn't tell from his big fat head.) That is where all the chicken treats are though & I do like me some chicken!
Oh and as if the day hadn't been boring enough, the lady gets home from work & instead of paying immediate attention to me, she has to doctor the man. He got himself a good case of some poison plant or somethin' like that. Whatever it is, it makes him itch like he's got fleas. They put all kinds of stuff on him & I tried to be helpful by licking it back off. If he would just let me help, I'm sure I could heal him right up, but noooooo. Don't listen to the dog that licks it's own wounds & heals them, hu uh, cause why would ya, geesh! Humans, I tell ya. Once she was done with him did she do anything fun with us, NO! Gave us each a rawhide & made us lay down on the couch so she can watch football, woohoo, again, boring! Well, the lady's getting her big rear up (finally), she said her team won, some Viking something or other. All I know is where they are gets LOTS of snow so they can't be all bad. I'm going to go tell her we should celebrate with chicken treats!
PS, If it rains again tomorrow, I may be forced to eat another wall, just sayin for instance...
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Sure the fence is secure...
Apparently, they didn't stretch the fence tight enough or something, (we are not offering any help, of course). OK it was like this, we were outside with the lady & a little boy came up to the fence & well, he had something tasty looking in his hands & on his face, soooooo, we had to see what it was. Much to our surprise (and the ladies) we pushed on the fence together & voila, we were able to wiggle right under it! Well this caused the lady to go completely insane & start shrieking for the man. Which then inturn caused the boy to freak out (he was doing just fine till the lady let out that death squall), it was ugly! It's not like we were going anywhere, we merely wanted to "clean" the lad up. Next thing we know, one human is running for the kid & our humans are acting like we have just done something awful! We got basically dragged back into our yard & the man went out & got these long metal stake things & pounded them thru the fence & way down into the ground. We've heard that more of that concrete stuff is coming next. It rained here so it was too wet to do immediately. At any rate, we have gotten a good chuckle at them, they did all that work & then all we had to do was push & crawl! WOO WOO!!! We say again, Silly Humans!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
We are very excited to announce that our real Mom is going to have more puppies in October. This is us with our sister Raja. We think our Mom & Dad make beautiful puppies. If anyone is interested you can check out where we came from at www.majesticsiberians.com . They are good humans there & only breed about twice a year. Our human parents looked at a lot of different breeders & choose these folks. The lady said she just got the best feeling about this breeder. She still keeps in contact with her & gives her updates on us. Originally the humans wanted to get rescues but since this is there first time having Huskies they thought better of it. Don't worry, we'll get them raised up right so that they can help our fellow Huskies in the future.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
MMMMM! Tasty Flowers!
Remember the flower beds we told ya all about? Well here they are, the top one used to be rose, iris, lily & ribbon grass. It took us all of about a hot 2 seconds to destroy this one. We do wish that the grass stuff would grow back though, that was pretty fun to roll around in when it was really tall. Hey, who knew it was gonna kill it, we were just inspecting it for any possible critters that might freak the lady out (well, it sounded good). We can not be held accountable for the humans ignorance! They brought us out here for a swim & then just let us run, like we were going to stay up on the hot deck, please!
The bottom one was just plain yummy! That's where the lady grows raspberries and are worth every thorn! And over in the corner there's an apricot tree, it's like a fruit buffet out here! We ask you fellow dogs, would you be able to resist? There ya go then. What do they expect?!
This is our newest conquest, it doesn't look like much in the picture, but we feel it has the makings of a good one! Keep in mind, this used to be all nice & grassy. We had to get that out of there, all it does is hinder the digging process. It took us a lot of running & many a "fight club" to get it to stop coming back. We've seen pictures of the craters that other huskies have dug where you can't see anything but their tails, that's what we hope to eventually be able to do! It's never to early to start practicing we figure. Well, until next time, may all your holes be muddy!